My Very First Sleepover.

Okay, so it's not MY first sleepover, but it's the first one that Riley is hosting and can I just tell you, I am covered in anxiety.

A few months ago, Riley slept over her friends' house because I was having my sinus surgery. Since that very day, in October of 2009, I swear, these girls have been planning the next sleepover. Riley will call her friends (who are sisters) and they will spend hours on the phone making lists and discussing what they will do at this sleepover.

With us moving in just a few short months, what better time than the present, to finally bite the bullet and host the sleepover these girls have been obsessing over for the past 4 months!

So, I'm not nervous about having them over. (I have security.) I love the girls and they are well-behaved and all-around polite little people. What I'm nervous about is what I DO with them when they are here, overnight. I never slept over anyone's house growing up. Not one birthday party sleepover. Never hosted one. I was never allowed. I didn't go to my first sleepover until my senior year of high school. Graduation night. And my friend's parents had to ask my parents for me...because I was so scared.

Anyway, with that in mind, I have no idea what to expect when these girls come over and settle in for the night. So, on Monday, I pulled Riley aside and asked her what they were going to do.

She said, "We're going to make potions, play with Barbies, do the play-doh thing, make a candy store with a tip jar, and uhhhh make more potions." In my mind, I'm running through the timeline and realized that oh, well, that will kill about 25 minutes. LOL. What will they do the rest of the night before they crash? Ryan suggested a movie. Great. But who knows how long they will last and what if they get bored? Then what?

So, being that I'm a planner...I forced Ryan to accompany me to Wal-Mart for a quick shopping trip. $50 later, I have projects. 3 projects for the girls to do...in between the playing they do or in their downtime when they are bored. My sister-in-law laughed at me when I told her about my anxiety and applauded my efforts with the crafty ideas...but I felt totally justified in being slightly nervous about it! The last thing I want is for these girls to ask to leave early or to go home and say that they didn't have a good time...I'm hoping it goes well. Wish us luck!

I'll post pictures of the crafts we do after the sleepover. But, if anyone has any ideas on free stuff we can do, please please please share them...would love to have some back-up plans!

Therapy Thursday: Grieving.

I know that the majority of my posts are lighthearted and about my kids. This morning, as I sit in front of my laptop, I can't help but write this post -- because I don't think I've had a chance to properly grieve over the passing of my Grandma.



One week ago today. I can't believe it's been one week.



It didn't hit me until last night while I was on the phone with my dad...talking about what Grandma's wishes were, about the letters she wrote to my parents and about my mom being in CA without me or my brother to see my Grandma for the last time. The whole thing is just so sad and I'm having a tough time swallowing it all.



I've always had this intense fear of death (thus, my fear that Grandma isn't with us anymore) and my thoughts of caution are always morbid. Let me explain...

I can remember being quite young and fearing the loss of my parents. Not that they did anything crazy -- but I was always scared that something would happen to them and I never wanted to be in a position to see them "un-alive." Now that I have my own children, my fears have turned into protecting THEM and praying that nothing bad ever happens to them...leading in the my morbid thoughts of caution.

I'm going through those thoughts now. While planning this trip to Key West with Ryan, I continue to think about what I'm going to write in my will. What will happen to the kids if something happens to us? What do I want for my children? Who will take care of them? I am realizing that I need to spell everything out -- especially after my Grandma's death -- and hope that those left to care for my kids will honor my wishes. It's just so scary. And it makes me want to cry just thinking about it. Death is freakin' scary.

So, I'm sad. I feel sick in my stomach. I can picture my Grandma at her healthiest time in her life and I miss that. I miss seeing her. I know she knew I loved her -- so I have zero regrets. I am just sad.

Ronan-ism #0210

*Ronan sneezes 3-4 times.

Me: Bless you, Ronan.
Ronan: Fanks (thanks). *Sneezes again.*
Me: Bless you, AGAIN!
Ronan: I don't know why I keep doin' dat. I keep on ha-chooing ober and ober again. And I keep on doin' da ha-chooing!

Me: (thinking I should do a better job dusting?)

Will Miss You, Grandma...

On February 11th, my beautiful Grandma passed away. The photo above was taken when Ronan was only a few days old...she had made the trip from Orange County, CA, to San Diego -- where we were living at the time. It was the last time I saw her.

I have the most fond memories of her. She made the BEST lobster dish (which noone can replicate...) She was so independent and loved to take my brother and I (when we were little) out on a bus in Pittsburgh to hit the candy stores downtown. She was versed in life, kept up with current events and always supported the charities she would see on TV. She prayed. A lot. She loved to talk about her journey to the United States in 1975 and was the only one who would share those scary stories about how hard it was to immigrate here.

Although I am deeply saddened by the passing of my Grandma, I am so comforted knowing that she is in a better place, she's finally with my Grandpa and that my children both had the opportunity to meet her. Love you so much, Ngoai.

An Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny...

blue and white polka dot bikini. Yes, a bikini. 2 pieces of small fabric. I made the leap. For the past, oh, I don't know...7 years, I have been wearing a mom suit. No, no ruffly one piece moo-moo, but I've been quite comfortable in the tankini, covering all problem areas. My stomach...problem area numero uno.

I have never had flat abs. In fact, I'm not sure I ever will. BUT, with the Key West trip looming over me, I told Ryan that I refuse to go on this trip and wear my 'mom suit' the entire time. I want to look cute. So last night, bathing suit shopping we went and that's the suit I came home with.

Made by Vitamin A, it's reversible and the bottoms are awesome...they are cheekier than I ever worn, but they don't give my butt that awful muffin roll you see sometimes when girls wear their suits a little too tight. AND, for the first time in YEARS...I'm going with a triangle top. It was too cute to walk away from, though.

If you have ever been to a Swim & Sport store, you'll know that they give you personal attention to choose your suit. Although I was ready to walk out initially (a little bit of a wait and I am impatient...), I'm glad I didn't because the lady was so attentive and gave me more options than I even considered.

Anyway, I'm thinking about hanging the Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Blue/White Polka Dot Bikini somewhere in front of the treadmill to give me more motivation during my workouts. Only a few more months....

Explanation Necessary.

I've said this before...when you give birth, they need to give you a manual that tells you what to say when the questions you aren't ready to answer arise. We had a moment with Riley not too long ago and it went something like this...

Riley: Momma, what's 'gay' mean?

Me: (slightly shocked) Uhhh, happy?

Riley: (pondering how she was going to use this in a sentence...)

Me: (silence and what felt like hours had gone by, but was only seconds)

Riley: I'm going to tell all my friends that I'm gay!

Me: (even more shocked, but smiling) You probably aren't going to want to say that...I'll let daddy tell you why.

[Okay, so at this point, there is no beating around the bush. We have friends that are gay, so it wasn't us not wanting to explain...I guess it was the more sexual part I was hoping to not get into.]

So Ryan enters.

Me: Daddy, why don't you tell Riley what gay means! She wants to tell all of her friends at school that she is gay.

Ryan: Well, you know how you have a mommy and a daddy? Some people have two mommies and two daddies.

Riley: (look of utter confusion and steam exiting both ears)

Me: (able to see the look and realizing she might be confusing it with step-parents/divorcees)

Ryan: (silence, but pride that he could add to conversation)

Riley: Uhhh, I don't get it.

Me: You know Ellen? From the Ellen Show?

Riley: Yeah?

Me: Well, Ellen is married to a woman. She loves a woman.

Riley: Ohhhhhh, I get it. Hey, can I have an ice cream? Vanilla okay?

OMG. Really? That's all she wanted was a freakin' ice cream? Goes to show that if you can be honest with your kid...even if it's not the best explanation...they are totally satisfied by it.

"I'm Loose."

Okay, not the words you ever want to hear from your daughter. Except when it refers to a tooth.

Yes, Riley finally, after 7 years and 7 months, has ONE LOOSE TOOTH. It's one of her tiny bottom front ones and since Sunday morning, has been an obsession for her. It's not really even that wiggly yet, but there is some movement and for Riley...some movement is better than no movement. She's the last in her class to have all of her baby teeth.

So now that the prospect of a tooth fairy visit is in the near future, what's the fair market value on the first tooth? Has it lost value? Is it underwater? Or is the tooth fairy handing out credit?

Wahhhhh....wahhhhh...I wanna go. Now!

To Key West, that is! Just a few more months until my sans-kids vacation with the hubby. Hurry up and get me there.

(Picture taken from this website.)

Kate Spade Giveaway

A friend of mine is doing a giveaway on her blog. Check it out!

Homemade Oreos

Thank you, odds and sods for posting this...

Homemade Oreos

Definitely something I'm going to have to try, considering it's part of one of Ronan's major food groups!

Potty Training Sucks Big Poop

Why wear these... When you can wear these....

O.m.g. Honest to goodness gracious.

Riley, ah, my Riley...such an easy child. Potty-trained at 2 1/2 years old...practically on her own. When she decided she was over the diapers, she was over it. And for 5 years, I never thought twice about it...except when we would be out and had to use public restrooms. Let's just say, we used enough toilet paper that you never even saw the toilet seat. (Those automatic flusher toilets, though...man, those were such a challenge to cover...anyway.)

Fast forward to my precious Ronan and it's like nothing we say or do or bribe him with will work. Go ahead and make your judgments. I'm sure I am doing nothing right. But can I just say that I am so.tired.of.poop.

[If you have no interest in reading about poop, I'd stop here.]

My friend gave me hinters on what to do with him...get him in unnerwears (as he says). I did. He loved them. But, didn't mind pooping in them, either. I freaked. I'll admit it. I lost my mind the first time I saw that turd in his brand new Diego underwear. And I was pissed. I'm sorry, but a three-pack of tiny underwear doesn't come cheap. And the companies know that parents will spend the money to appease their toddlers with cartoon-themed underwear to get through this horrific experience. So there we were, down to 2 pairs.

He didn't care. I offered him M&Ms. High-5s. A new monster truck. Two new monster trucks. A trip to see the monster truck show. Tokens for Chuck E. Cheese. A trip to Chuck E. Cheese. A million dollars. Nothing.

But yesterday, oh yesterday...that was the kicker.

I have a bad gag reflex. (Need I say more?!) The boy pooped and I thought I could taste it, I was dry-heaving while changing him. I don't know what to do. And now, I'm down to one pair. One.

Let him go naked? Sure. But then we run the high risk of pee all over my floor and furniture.

Putting him back into diapers is not an option and unless underwear comes in bulk, I am not sure I want to spend the money on clothing I'm going to have to throw away...(for those of you that used cloth diapers, how did you do it?!)

I guess I could face reality and say that the child might not be ready for this step in life. But momma is exhausted. Momma is tired of human sized poo that isn't in toilet. Momma is begging on hands and knees for the lightbulb in little man's head to go off and think that it is cool to poop on the potty. Please. Pretty please.

Although you might be grossed out at this point, I do have to share a funny something he said the other day, when I pleaded with him to use the potty:

"Momma, I can't. It's gonna hurt me. I skerred (scared), it's gonna be a big poops."

Help me.

Outta Shape.

Just when I thought I was making progress on our treadclimber, burning calories, toning up...I decided to try the 30 Day Shred, with the Biggest Loser trainer, Jillian Michaels...and let's just say, I am completely outta shape. Level 1, for the beginners, kicked.my.butt.

I found myself panting during the first minute and it was only the warm-up! I never realized how hard jumping jacks were, until I did them last night, along with all the other cardio I did. And just as I thought I wanted to quit (3 minutes into the video), Jillian managed to say that a ripped body doesn't come for free and that you have to work for it. Even though I hated her, she was right and I pushed through and did the full 20 minutes.

Today, I feel great. Slightly sore and ready for more. Not too much longer until my Key West vacay with the hubby and I am determined to NOT wear a mommy bathing suit there. Minimal coverage, here I come. I think.

Gasparilla 2010

Our last time:
Although the day was gloomy and all weather forecasters called for massive rain...it held out until the very end of the boat parade -- and thanks to Ryan's coworkers for helping Riley and Ronan collect all their beaded necklaces.

Such a great event to experience here in Tampa -- it'll be one of the things I'll greatly miss when we move. And if you ever have the chance to visit Tampa, time it so it coincides with Gasparilla weekend...it's a must see.