Why Won't He Stop...

CRYING?

Ronan had such a good day today and for the last 3 hours since Ryan has been home, I swear all Ronan has been doing is cry. Or whine. Or freak out. Enough that Ryan decided he was going to take a drive and return some things.

All I wanted was a shower and I got one, in less than 2 minutes. He started freaking out when I walked into the shower. Freaking out.

I pretty much can't do anything without him...I swear, sometimes I think he wants to get back into the uterus. (Which, would be the most utterly painful feeling at this point, considering how big he is and how much he squirms...yuck.) But, I'm getting a little frustrated and all I want to do is cry.

I can't make phone calls. Did you know that? Because when I pick up the phone, he screams for me to pay attention to him. And when I make lunch, you would have thought that I took away his birthday or something, because he cries. And even though he is happy to see Ryan when he gets home from work, he stays with me. He might run to give Ryan a quick hug, but then he's back in my arms again.

Many times, I have to remind myself that he's still a baby and that these moments will only last for so long. But, it's hard to do anything for myself when you have a little person who won't give you but one minute to sit on the toilet and pee. (He used to freak out when I did that. Now, he'll just stand there, hand me toilet paper, say "stinky" and wave bye-bye when I flush the toilet...and that's just for the peeing part of it.)

Right now, while I type this post, he's standing on my right foot, holding onto the mouse and moving it all over the place and grabbing onto my hand. I know he loves me and that's what I have to remember. But, it still doesn't mean I can't cry for a couple minutes because motherhood has made me forget about who I am sometimes...